The Doan Whisperer

With the Canadiens apparently showing some kind of love for Coyotes captain Shane Doan, an unrestricted free agent, it just seems a wonderful opportunity for both clubs.

The thing is, Doan’s a centreman, (okay, maybe a right winger) and Montreal already has about ten of them signed and ready to go. It’s a plethora of centremen, and one would think a trade would definitely have be in the works to make room. And Phoenix would need to replace Doan up the middle with a big, goal-scoring, feisty star who doesn’t mind scrapping. So we’ll give them a guy who absolutely fits the bill. We’ll give them Scott Gomez.

Phoenix fans, I know you haven’t had the opportunity to see Gomez in action very often, but you’d love him. You wouldn’t even miss Doan. Gomez would step in and pick up the torch and you’d be really happy with him. He plays mean and tough and has great hands. It’s probably even an upgrade for you. I just can’t say enough about the guy.

I wish like crazy that we could keep him but like I said, we have a boatload of centremen and it’s the old adage – you have give up something good to get something good.

Trust me, your Coyotes should make this deal. I’m just thinking of you and how I want your team to succeed and stay in the desert, and you can be sure that Mr. Gomez will knock your socks off. He’s fantastic. A game-breaker. We all love him. Oh, if there was only some way we could keep him.

We’ll bite the bullet and take Doan, even though it just wouldn’t be the same as having number 11. But we’ll adjust. We know it’s a business and we lose our favourites from time to time. And we want you to succeed. Hab fans have big hearts that way.


11 thoughts on “The Doan Whisperer”

  1. You forgot to mention that Gomez is, coincidently, the same size as the Yote’s owner, Gary Buttman

  2. I think Doan is a winger…an RW to be exact. If he is a Centre or a RW then I think we’d be adding excess weight for nothing. We’re loaded up the wazoo with RWs and Cs, so if he can’t play LW then we may be shooting ourselves in the foot – although anything is better than Gomez. That’s like shooting yourself in BOTH feet just before going up to dance in a big dance competition.

    If Phoenix does want Gomez, they could have a “see the game with an NHL star” night for every home game (ok, admittedly “star” is an outright lie but that will be our dirty secret). Since he’ll probably be benched for 90% of the time anyways, why not have him take turns sitting in the crowd with other people? They can do it as a promotion – for every 25 hot dogs you “win” a game with Gomez.

    The Blackhawks are now doomed. Reports are saying that Gauthier will be hired as a scout for them! Oh how I pity Chicago fans.

    You should have been a salesman Dennis. 🙂

  3. As great as he is, offering Gomez to Phoenix might not be enough to get Shane Doan. We may have to also give up one of our best defencemen, Tomas Kaberle.

    I know it seems like a lot to give up, but like you said – you have to give quality to get quality.

  4. Doan is a right wing. Doan wants to stay in the Western Conference. Doan wants to remain as close as possible to his farm.

    Montreal fits none of this.

  5. These are just details. And the Coyotes would be crazy to pass up on an elite marquee player of Gomez’s caliber.

  6. Dennis,

    I once took the City of New Orleans from Memphis up to Chicago (ask me some day about the Canadian lady with the gas-buuble eye I met on that trip, you know the old song “Well I think that I’ll have seen everything when I’ve seen a gas bubble eye) and spent a few days there. My overall impression is that they are open, talkative people with a love of sport and good conversation.

    PG should fit right in then. They’ll realise that they’ve never been to a real press conference once Cheeky Pete has ’em rolling in the aisles with his knockabout style.

    And while my hockey knowledge is second to everyone’s I thought the Blackhawks looked weak up the middle and their offence could do with a puck handler who has that tricky veer away left just when the shooting lane opens up.

    With Pierre’s knowledge of the Habs roster it’s only a question of time ‘afore he comes calling for Scotty boy.

    No reason why the Habs can’t play the Hawks off against the Yotes and walk away laughing (although not too loudly or they’ll give the game away).

  7. Danno, what happens if Phoenix doesn’t want our star defenceman but instead want a second star forward like Bourque? Can we part with him? Imagine if they demand the whole shebang.

  8. Blue Bayou, I think you’re right. Scotty would make an excellent Hawk. He would remind older Chicago fans of Bobby Hull!

  9. Hobo, I wonder who would be more inclined to go into corners – Gomez or Buttman. I’m leaning toward Buttman.

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