Tag Archives: One Direction

Boys To Men

The kids are staying with the Habs and of course this is great news. They’re so exciting to watch, they’ve injected a healthy dose of vim and vigour into the club, and I’m happy this has transpired, even though the players’ wives may want to mother them instead of me. You see, it’s all about the team, and I’m almost willing to sacrifice the wives’ warmth for the overall good. That’s the kind of guy I am.

Alex Galchenyuk won’t be 19 years old for another two weeks and makes $925,000. When I was 18 I remember having ten bucks once. The best things I owned were a jean jacket and the Sgt. Pepper’s album. The only time I was asked for my signature was at the police station when I was busted for drinking underage. The only time people cheered for me was when somebody admired my long bank into the near corner to win a snooker game at Dino’s pool hall.

Imagine how proud Galchenyuk’s mom and dad must be. It was only a few years ago that he was just a kid, tormenting his sister, being yelled at to turn the music down, leaving his socks all over the place, and being a regular goofy teen who loses most brain cells and gets them back a few years later. And those parties, those crazy nights when he screamed “Rock and Roll!” at the top of his lungs and lunged at giggling girls as he guzzled lemon gin and puked the night away. Of course I don’t know any of this for sure, but he’s a teen, so it must have happened.

Brendan Gallagher’s way older. He 20, so he’s mature. Probably no lemon gin, no screaming, very little puking. Maybe he still hassles his sister but I understand that. The way they spend so much time in front of the mirror and all that.

Hopefully, because Gallagher’s much older, he can guide young punk Galchenyuk along the way. Teach him the ways of the world like older guys do. Wean him off One Direction and skateboards. Take him to the store and get him pants that don’t fall down.

This is how the world evolves. And it will be probably be extremely helpful for the two kids to sometimes be around really old guys, men from another time, a distant past, like Carey Price, who’s 25. But it’s a generation gap. What could they possibly talk about?