St. Louis Wins In A Shootout. Grrrrrr. S**t, F**k.

For two and a half periods tonight, the Montreal Canadiens would have had a hard time beating Byer’s Bulldozers Orillia Midgets circa 1965. (with a smallish but speedy Ralph Backstrom-type right winger).

And it the end, it bit them hard as the lowly St. Louis Blues, full of Canadians and Americans, waltzed into Montreal, full of nothing, and came away with a 4-3 shoot-out win.

I knew the sleeping with the wives, the paying of bills, the shoveling of the sidewalk, the washing of dishes, the visits from the in-laws, the catching up on phone calls, the diaper changing, the grocery shopping, the praise from strangers on the street, was gonna effect the play of the team. I had a feeling Montreal might suck tonight.

And in general, they did.

Their passes were off, their shots missed the net, they fell down often, they ran into each other, they looked confused, they were out of sync. And sadly, Halak was mediocre. It was just a bad night. And most of all, it was two important points slip, slidin’ away.

It’s no wonder the Soviet National teams of the ’60’s, ’70’s and ’80’s were so good. Everything was in sync because when they weren’t playing house, they were holed up in camps living together, eating together, playing soccer, working in gyms, and practising on the ice.

Of course they hated it and wanted to lynch coaches Bobrov and later, and especially, Tikhonov, but the results were there. No wives, no snow shoveling, no phone calls, no mother-in-laws. Just hockey.

But of course that won’t work nowadays. Not in the NHL, anyway. But I want to know why teams come out flat like the Habs did tonight. Why was everything out of whack? What causes this? Should the Habs hire Viktor Tikhonov?

You could say they took the Blues lightly because St. Louis has twenty points less than Montreal. But every game now, as I’ve said before, is a huge game for Montreal. So taking a team lightly doesn’t cut it. It has to be the wives.

Next up, Thursday in Boston. Out of the house, on a plane, into a hotel, eat group meals.  Price is probably back in goal.

They’d better win this one. It’s important.

And one last thing. I have a photo of Bobby Rousseau in the early 1960’s scoring on a penalty shot by blasting a slapshot from just inside the blueline. Everyone now tries the fancy stuff. Why don’t they just move in and fire away. Goalies are human.

4 thoughts on “St. Louis Wins In A Shootout. Grrrrrr. S**t, F**k.”

  1. DK,

    Once again something I wrote has simply vanished. @#@$@$E!!

    Like all good Habbers, DK, you clearly grasp the universal truth that things are connected: the head bone to the neck bone, the man to the woman, the wife to the husband, the Habber to his team, the wife to his team. And, yes, it is invariably the wife’s fault, both indiviually and collectively, when things go wrong with the Habs. Alas, unlike Charlie Brown who realized that he too was connected to the universe in mysterious ways that made him guilty of pretty well everything that went wrong in his world, les femmes either refuse to aknowledge their culpability and/or to accept responsbility for their subversive indifference to the fate of the Habs. Nothing new there, eh? I mean, they’ve been blowing off us patriarchs ever since Eve munched on the first apple with blithe disregard for the worm within. I believe that William Blake, that 18thC poet and mystic, anticpated our dilmma when he penned this poem:

    The Sick Rose

    O Rose, thou are sick!
    The invisible worm
    That flies in the night
    In the howling storm,
    Has found out thy bed
    Of crimson joy,
    And his dark secret love
    Does thy life destroy.

    Clearly, he is referring to the Habs (including the fans) – the `red’ of the Rose can represent nothing other than a Habs jersey as well as the luuv of the fan for his team; and, yes, we have been/are a bit `sick’ in that our play is far too inconsistent; games are played for the most part `in the night’, of course; also, there can be no doubt that the `invisible worm’ is both the connection through which Habber’s wives channel their negative vibes/as well as the the vibes; as for the `howling storm’ , ha!, easy – the outrage of the Habber’s at the Hab’s performance combined with the gnawing frustration that they can do nothing about their wive’s complicity in it; of course, once married the first thing the wife/woman does is plug into her Habber hubby’s `bed of crimson joy’ which clearly is a metaphorical reference to the delight that the true Habber takes in his team;; the worm is naturally an expression of the animus which is the male aspect of the female; finally, the `life’ that is `destroyed’ is without doubt the hockey season.

    What can we do about this sorry state of affairs? Alas, there’s not much we can do. Yes, various panaceas have been suggested but nothing seems to work for long. The chief stumbling block to a solution seems to be the wive’s inability to apprehend the extent of the damage they do so perhaps the only way to deal with this problem is to, well, bring them on board. Yes, I know, it’s radical but if enough of them can be converted to the bleu blanc et rouge the insidious effects of the `worm’ on our `bed’ may well be neutralized. Who knows? Perhaps in time we could even learn how to harness the `worm’ and aim it at other teams. Sure, the cost is high but nowadays women have infiltrated pretty much all the traditional male domains so why not Habberdom? And, hey, as part of the price of their admission, we could stipulate that they buy the beer. It’s a natural progression: Habber is connected to the beer, the wife to the Habber, eh voila! the wife to the beer.

    Any better ideas out there?

  2. Wives buying the beer is a good, and important start. I also feel separate beds are needed. And there’s nothing wrong with the little lady doing some snow snoveling now and again. Keep the mother-in-law away. And no talking while guy-in-slump is sleeping.
    It can’t be too much to ask. After all, the poor guy brings home a six-figure paycheque every two weeks.

  3. LES CANADIENS

    IT seem like the underated team got the best of les CANADIENS, bet u BOSTON will come out strong,gonna be like a playoff game ,i am off now for 4 days i should be watching a few games,we will see who is more hungry for the game,NEW JERSEY is playing also,i think CARBONNEAU should stick with PRICE for the rest of the season and the playoff,
    GOOD DAY

    D.G.

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