Sergei Non-Jokes And Leaf Great Jokes

Who do you know who makes $585,000 a year? Let’s see. There’s a few guys in town who might, but I don’t know them well enough to ask. The Prime Minister of Canada doesn’t. The CEO of BC Ferries is somewhere up around there. Most mayors of towns and cities don’t. US president Obama makes only $400,00.

But Sergei Kostitsyn does. He’s a kid from Belarus, where his dad probably earned $100 bucks a month and his mom $50. He came to North America and played junior, where he was given chump change every week. Then, whammy, he signs a contract for more than the President of the United States and the Prime Minister of Canada, begins living in a pad his family, aunts, uncles and ten of his closest friends could live comfortably in; beautiful women throw themselves at him, and shady characters decide he’d could be sort of a friend and associate because he has money and is a sports star.

And somewhere along the line, young Sergei’s mind drifted from hockey a little. His play suffered and his partying improved. His coach and teammates got mad at him, but gangsters and beautiful women told him he was great.

Now he’s been demoted, doesn’t know whether he should head across the pond or stay and try to do what Bob Gainey suggests. It’s a dilemna. What does older brother Andrei say?  Maybe not much because he’s bringing in $3.2 million and doesn’t want to rock the boat.

What do Sergei’s Montreal gangster friends say? Probably nothing, because as long as Sergei isn’t in Montreal and is struggling to have a career, he’s no use to them anymore.

What do the beautiful women say? We like you, Sergei, but you’re in Hamilton now and there’s no way we’re going to Hamilton to see you. Are you kidding?

So Sergei’s on his own for  now. It’s up to him. We’ll see in the next few months if this is a kid who can twist his head back to where it should be twisted.

 Also, for your reading enjoyment, Danno sends this link to 15 pages of Toronto Maple Leafs jokes published in the Toronto Star. Poor Leafs. Poor, poor Leafs. “Dammit, the Leafs lost tonight. How do you know? It’s after 10pm.”–readers-share-their-favourite-leaf-jokes#comments

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