Reasons Why the Team Didn’t Win Last Night

It almost makes me sick when I think about this.

The overall scenario is this. The Habs had been in a deep funk for a month, couldn’t win at home, and the guys who are expected to be in the forefront were instead sucking exhaust. Guys like Saku Koivu, who had fallen off the star cliff and had held on to his respect soley by his great leadership and personal good deeds around the city. I mean, everyone everywhere loves Saku Koivu. I do too, although not as much as my wife and Sophia Loren. Anyway, it’s great that everyone loves Saku, but the problem is, he’s forgotten how to score goals. But three games ago, the team played great and won in Philadelphia. Then on Saturday night, the team won again, and sacre bleu! (I don’t know the Finnish equivalent), Saku got two big goals.

Now the team is flying, but before you can sing that incessant Bell Centre sorry excuse for a song, this no name bunch of scalliwags, the Florida Panthers, come in to Montreal, and wouldn’t you know it,  scurry out of town with a 3-2 win. In the process, Montreal played with no enthusiasm, were booed throughout the night, and now they’re back to square one. (can’t win at home, back in a slump, Koivu not producing, etc. etc.)

So there has to be a reason. And this is it.

The Christmas party. During the big snowstorm a few days back, the team was lucky enough to be in Montreal with several days off before they played Florida. And they had a Christmas party.

And down the drain went the focus. Maybe a few wives don’t like each other and this caused complications. Maybe some players had too much to drink. Maybe cliques raised their ugly heads. Maybe getting more tail than usual back at the ranch wore them out. Maybe someone said something to the boss (Carbonneau). Who knows? Overall, they probably weren’t thinking as much as they should about the upcoming game.

Last but not least – the turkey at the Christmas party. Too much turkey causes listlessness, cramps, and an overwhelming desire to nap.

I say cancel Christmas parties for the team and reschedule them in July.

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