Gaston Took The Time To Help Out

He’s a ladies man, a world-traveler, an ex-con, a horrible lecher, a big Habs fan, a nasty drunk, he can’t be trusted, and is a complete asshole.

Now I find out he was sort of a fifth Beatle.

“Gaston wasn’t a musician in the band,” says an Abbey Road spokesman, “but he ran everything. He looked after the groupies, the drugs, and the alcohol, and told the boys all they had to do was concentrate on their music. What a generous and gracious guy he was. Almost a saint.”

I also discovered that Gaston frequently told the four Beatles to leave Pattie, Maureen, Cynthia and Jane in his capable hands while the guys were traveling, which I thought was quite kind of him, as the ladies must have taken up a great deal of his time. And out of the goodness of his heart, even suggested that he stay with the ladies overnight so they wouldn’t be afraid when the boys were away.

He did, however, tell John to take Yoko with him as much as possible, for some reason.

11 thoughts on “Gaston Took The Time To Help Out”

  1. Well done Dennis, brought a smile to my face. It’s so cold here today, crap, I love summer and so far it’s been a bust.

  2. Moey, it’s nice today but it’s been a rare occasion. I know how much you love warm weather so I’m predicting that summer will offically kick in later but stay longer. Maybe it’ll be summer all next winter!

  3. Lapierre, Moey? The smile that players hate. He can play but sometimes his head is a little off-kilter I think. Mike Milbury hated him so for that reason alone I like him. He’s become a good fit in Vancouver. Higgins too.

  4. Dennis, I don’t want to think about what that asshole Gaston did to the Beatle wives but no matter what he did they were still less assholish moves than 47 year old Bill Wyman hitting on a 13 year old. Is there any truth to rumours that as they were driving past her elementary school he pointed at her and dared Bill to make a move.

  5. I hadn’t heard that, Chris. I just wonder where her parents were. And all the chicks a Rolling Stone could get and he chooses her. Not good. Not cool.

  6. for bill’s side of the story read “stone alone” the adventures of the stone’s through bill’s experience. he kept records of everything they did, even down to the mere shilling of every gig from day one. he even kept records of the number of women each had on one tour. of course he had way more than anyone, that was his thing, followed by brian jones, mick and keith were a distant third and fourth respectively, charlie was always married and stayed true even tho gaston was visiting his wife while he was on tour…………………………..i feel like i should be writing for the old dear dennis column.

  7. for bill’s side of the story, and there is always another side, read “stone alone”. an excellent account of the goings on in stone world by bill. he meticulously kept records of everything, the mere shillings they made on there first gigs on through the big times. on one tour he kept track of how many women, to the number each of the boys had. bill had by far the most, that was his thing, followed by brian, mick and keith a distant third and fourth respectively and charlie who was married and faithful even tho gaston was visiting his wife while they were on the road………………………. i feel like a reporter for the old dear dennis column

  8. i dunno…… posted the first one well before and it didn’t show up until i posted the second

  9. “An insightful and rivetting addition to the Beatles story. Mr Kane is never less than convincing in his judicious use of previously uncovered sources. The only quibble we would have is that the characterisation of the mysterious Gaston is perhaps a little wooden”.

    Rolling Soap Magazine – the bible for those who like their cleansing agents circular

  10. Blue Bayou, this is why Bob Dylan stopped talking to the media. No one will ever know the real Gaston. You call him “wooden”? You don’t know the real Gaston. Only a few do. Unfortunately, they’re all doing hard time and can’t comment right now.

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