I think most people enjoy eating while watching games. Peanuts, popcorn, and crackerjacks at the ball game. Pig intestines at bull fights. Feral cats at Bruins games.
But what do you eat at home when the Habs are playing?
Today I offer a few select dishes from my personal recipe book to help you.
1. Take two slices of bread and gently insert cheese (any type) between them. Spread butter or margarine on the outside of bread and place in a hot pan. Brown one side and then the other. Make sure you flatten properly, using an iron or your palm, or even with a kitchen utensil if so desired. This fascinating dish, which is the hit of my dinner parties, is what I like to call Fromage de Grilled.
2. Carefully open a bun of approximately six inches long and place a cooked wiener inside. Add relish and/or mustard and top with fried onions. Do not overcook wiener as it will go limp, and we know that can’t be good. This wonderful entree, which I have perfected, is called Chien Chaud or Dog du Hot.
3. Gingerly open the top of a pasta package and pour into boiling water. Make sure water is salted but do not use ocean water. Stir occasionally until pasta is soft, then drain and add delectable cheese powder, a touch of milk, and a tiny bit of butter. This little treat, known as Dinner du Kraft, will soon have you taking Italian lessons and dreaming of riding in a gondola along the canals of Venice.
4. Place one or two slices of bread into the machine that gets hot when button is pushed down. In only a few short minutes, bread will pop up and is now toasted and ready for butter. After butter is applied, slowly spread peanut butter evenly over top, making sure no areas of toast are missed. This is known on the dinner party circuit as Peanut Butter sur Toast.’ And for those with even more imagination, simply add raspberry or strawberry jam to top of the peanut butter and press hard to mix well. This is called Peanut Butter sur Toast avec Jam.
5. At the top of the stove you will see dials. One of these dials will say ‘oven’ and it will have numbers on it. Turn dial to about 375 and insert dinner, which has been frozen to keep freshness in, into the lower area of the stove which will open up when pulled. Check periodically when there is a time-out in the action, and when it looks like the delicious mashed potatoes are bubbling, take dinner from stove, remove wrap from top, and dig in. This meal, which is great when you’re trying to impress, is fondly called Dinner de Frozen. Or, in the old days, the more popular name was Le Frozen Dinner de TV.
6. Make your way to a specialized utensils shop and pick up a progressive turning handle lid remover. Using lid remover, remove lid from the solid and convenient tin container which contains a smooth blend of pasta, herbs and spices, then empty contents into a pot and place on the type of stove mentioned in number 5. Stir frequently until delicacy is hot, and dig in. Mmm. This specialty dish, known as Ravioli de le Can, is a sure hit when your date comes over for the game and you want to get lucky afterward.